CANCELLED!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVES DISMAYED
"BIGGEST TRAGEDY OF MY LIFE"
"PERMANENTLY TRAUMATIZED"
WANDERING DAZED AND CONFUSED IN LIBERAL, KANSAS
Liberal KA (NYT) Weather conditions forced the cancellation of the day 12 Dalhart TX to Liberal KA leg of a planned 33 day cross country bicycle trip. Cyclists in Dalhart awoke to headwinds gusting to 45 mph, blowing snow and temperatures in the mid 20's. Participants experienced the ultimate humiliation, riding the SAG van to Liberal KA.
The obsessive compulsive riders were dismayed by the cancellation. David Pramann of Burns MN questioned the decision of ride leaders. "Hell, in Minnesota we ride in these conditions all the time. I would've put on some knee warmers and gone for it. Snow's not even sticikin'."
Especially traumatized were the EFI's (Every Fu___ng Inch), riders who insist they ride every inch of the tour no matter conditions, or their life will be unfulfilled. Once they arrived in Liberal, some made a futile attempt to make up the 114 mile stage by riding around the block at the hotel. Floris van Overveld of Amsterdam was found at dusk in the hotel parking lot in a stupor vomiting uncontrollably. "I made 371 laps but I just got so dizzy. How can I face my mates at my club, Gaul after riding the SAG wagon? They will laugh me off the team . I am humiliated." Jeremy Snodgrass of Racine WI was aimlessly roaming the Days Inn lobby muttering "they don't even have spin cycle here, not even a frickin' life cycle, gotta ride, gotta ride, gotta .........." Roger Egli of Vail CO ran 14 miles and performed 2 hours of calisthenics. He then explained a complex formula he uses for converting various forms of exercise to biking miles involving a mathematical model developed at an physiology lab in Geneva, Switzerland." I've got 87 miles so far, but I have another 3 hours before bed. Does this hotel have stairs?" gasped Roger. Dan Brooks of Atlanta was seen in the parking lot at noon pounding on a blue trailer yelling "Barbara, lunch, I need lunch, honest, I washed my hands, twice."
Dr. Sven Blomquist Phd. , an exercise psychologist at the University of Minnesota is an expert on CBS (compulsive biking syndrome). Speaking on condition of anonymity, he offered some insight on the carnage in Liberal KS. " I've done a great deal of research on this condition, but boy, these people are really tweaked. I've never seen it so bad. They need some help. I don't know how anybody could live with them."
Area man Josh Skeedle observing the scene from the sidewalk, said "one of those biker guys told me Liberal, Kansas was an oxymoron, shucks, I don't get it, we got cows but no ox, and we ain't stupid."
A rather unusual weather pattern has become established over much of the
ReplyDeleteCentral and Northern U.S. given the time of year. A major surge of cold
air is being ushered in with a strong cold front and upper level trough
through the Great Plains and into the Upper Midwest. There is enough cold
air in place for some additional snow on the northwest side of the
precipitation shield, and there are even winter storm warnings and winter
weather advisories out for parts of Minnesota, Wisconsin, and Iowa through
tonight.
Having mentioned the strong cold front, temperatures will be at least 10
to 20 degrees below average from Texas to the Dakotas through the end of
the week. There will likely be widespread frost for northern and western
Texas, and widespread sub-freezing temperatures are expected for overnight
lows from Kansas and points northward. Many record low temperatures are
expected as a result of this unseasonably cold airmass!
Good luck Tom. Dress warm.
And I thought playing golf in 77 degrees with a 5 MPH wind was fun. I am envious! I am very impressed though! Keep it up, the riding I mean
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